Tuesday, July 20, 2010
I had a really hard time falling asleep last night. I took a quick nap around 8:30 (15-20 minutes), and I was sure that I would be out like a light come 10:30. Then I decided to watch the next few episodes of True Blood on DVD (I really like that show and I can't explain why, I just do). It's hard to sleep after you see some weird-ass shit go down.
So anyway, fast forward to 12am or so, and I am lying awake in bed next to my sleeping husband, thinking about a million things all at once. I find myself talking to myself quite a bit. Actually, it's more like I am talking to an audience, except one that lives inside my head. I craft essays, present ideas, talk through issues as though there is someone else listening. I guess it's therapeutic because I can't quite seem to stop. The topics are usually esoteric, maybe that's why I never bother putting pen to paper. At least in my head I feel interesting and relevant, even if that is never quite the case.
Of course now that it is morning, I can hardly remember what it was that I was even thinking about. I hope I'm not the only one that does that. I've always kind of lived in my head, and that's not a bad thing until I decide I want to rejoin the real world. Then I always feel just a little out of place.