Thursday, March 10, 2011

On Getting Old

In exactly one month, I will officially be closer to 30 than 20. The big 2-6. Which I know isn't exactly old, but it is in many ways much older than I feel. It is amazing how our inner dialogues don't seem to age like the rest of us.

I had the day off of work and it is actually very pleasant today, so I was in a very good mood as I left my house to run some errands. One of the items on my agenda was to pick up some dry cleaning and as the cleaners is located a stone's throw from my high school, I decided that I should drive past the school for old time's sake.

It is amazing what can change in the course of 8 years. The high school is still on the same lot, but the position and the structure are completely different from when I went there. They started to rebuild when I was sophomore or junior, but it wasn't until several years after I had graduated that it was completed. Driving past Arvada West, but a very different Arvada West is when it really hit me that this aging thing just isn't going to stop. The cd I was listening to was Punk-O-Rama 9, a cd that I consider one of my "newer" punk albums. Then I realized that I owned that particular cd since it came out in 2004.

For a moment I was a little sad and nostalgic for the "old" days, back when I thought I had it all figured out the whole world. And nothing seemed so important as going to concerts and hanging out with friends. Don't get me wrong, I was always a pretty responsible kid with a job and good grades, but back then I still had plenty of carefree days.

Now I am a married home-owner with a baby on the way. I work in human resources for a national laboratory. Such a different life than I ever thought I would have! But I am very lucky to have this life, to have an amazing husband and a good job in this economy. And I certainly don't feel like my life is over; far from it. But I do have to come to terms with the fact that my youth is no longer "stretched before me." I have traded limitless possibilities for a husband and a home and a child. I have made choices and have grown up just a little bit and while I am happy with my decisions, it is still a bit of a harsh reality. No denying that you are getting old when "young Hollywood" is several years younger than you (I am looking at you, Zac Efron).

4 comments:

Carly Anne said...

"But I do have to come to terms with the fact that my youth is no longer "stretched before me." I have traded limitless possibilities for a husband and a home and a child. I have made choices and have grown up just a little bit and while I am happy with my decisions, it is still a bit of a harsh reality. No denying that you are getting old when "young Hollywood" is several years younger than you (I am looking at you, Zac Efron)."

So perfectly stated. Sigh, I am struggling in the same way...


Xo
Carly

All This is Grace and Charm
http://allthisgraceandcharm.blogspot.com

Kyle said...

... but Zac Efron is so adorable!! And in all fairness, he's an adult now, his youth is no longer stretched out before him either. Sort of. 23 isn't that far off from you, young lady. ;)

You know what we need to do? Get some cinnamon schnapps, old milwaukee, an Avenged Sevenfold cd and beeline for the frisbee golf park!! Ahh... memories! ;)

gin said...

26 is a good age. :) And the celebs are going to keep getting younger, but not necessarily better (I'm looking at you, Justin Bieber)

Nicole said...

Carly - It's bittersweet, no doubt.

Kyle- Sounds like a plan...

Gin - Valid, valid point!

:)